Are Fathers Obsolete?

A wise son hears his father’s instruction, but a scoffer does not listen to rebuke. (Proverbs 13:1)

There is a cultural movement in America today driving us away from respecting men in general and fathers in particular. From whence this has come may not be hard to identify. Generations of inconsiderate men ignored the opinions and thoughts of women. Another generation or two of fathers have abandoned their families. A sentiment within radical feminism has declared no discernible difference between men and women. New definitions of marriage and family state two moms are equal to a mother and a father. And most recently the fluidity of gender has worked to confuse everything. All are components to the cheapening of manhood.

For the sake of transparency, a “man” is defined as an individual who from birth is biologically/anatomically male as characterized by an Xy chromosome pair. He is selfless. He stands on his principles. He is a protector and provider. He uses the gifts God has given him – strength, intelligence, drive, etc. – for the sake of building others up rather than manipulating them. A “father” is a man who is there for his family. He has committed his life to the mother of his child(ren) through marriage. He will stop at nothing to protect his wife and children. He will set his wants aside for the sake of their needs. He will lead and teach his family through his words and actions. He ensures the family goes to church, reads the Bible, and prays. He actively oversees and even participates in the education of his children.

All too often, however, we see “boys” who are pretending to be “men”. Again, let me define my terms. A “boy” is an anatomically/biologically endowed male (characterized by an Xy chromosome pair) of ANY age who is defined by his selfish pursuit of pleasure, money, instant gratification, and a growing collection of stuff. “Boys” may look like “men”. They even sometimes behave like “men”, but it lasts only long enough for the “boy” to get what he wants, then he’s back to his old ways. “Boys” make horrible husbands and even worse “fathers”. They simply don’t care enough for other people to put in the time and effort necessary. “Boys” are quick to leave when things get challenging. “Boys” need to grow up.

It takes a man to be a father. Men stay. Men pray. Men love. Men take care of their families.

Lo and behold, this how the Lord has created things to work! Families work best (note the superlative) when composed of a husband/father, wife/mother, and children. This is what the Lord meant when He said, “a man will leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife”. Within the family that works best, fathers father their children, mothers mother their children, and children are loved, nurtured, and well adjusted as a result. Far from being obsolete, good fathers are necessary and irreplaceable. There is no substitute for a man who loves and cherishes his wife, while nourishing and protecting his children. This is a God-pleasing thing!

Gracious Father, thank you for creating men. Strengthen them to be who you created them to be. Raise up good men who will father their children while loving their families. Cause selfish boys to grow into to good men. Through Jesus Christ. Amen.


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